The Passing Lane

When it comes to worldly possessions, my house ranks #1. Coming in at #1.5, my vehicles. I have a 1999 Mercedes CLK320 and a 2005 HUMMER H2. Most of us drive out of necessity. We have to get to and from work, go to the grocery store, take the kids to soccer practice. (I don't do the kids thing, but let's assume you do.) For some, driving is a chore. For me, it's a joy, a thrill, an exciting part of my daily routine. That is, until some slow poke gets in my way in the passing lane on the freeway.

I grew up in Detroit; the Motor City; the car capital of the world, though not for long. I love cars. I've been driving since the age of 13 even though I could not officially take driver's education until age 15. My father started teaching me the basics of driving early. And, unbeknownst to him, my great-grandmother, whom we called Grannie, allowed me to serve as her chauffeur on many occasions. She had a blue Pontiac Sunbird that was small enough to make me look a few years older behind the wheel. Both of my parents worked and Grannie was our combination babysitter/housekeeper and anytime we had to go someplace, I would ask to drive. I guess it was my charming personality that always seemed to convince her to hand me the keys. Ok, it was the temper tantrum I threatened to throw if she didn't hand me the keys. Mmmm, that wouldn't have worked either because Grannie had no problem keeping me, or my brother and sister in line when necessary. The real reason she would let me drive-- she didn't want to. Driving with Grannie was fun and it put me ahead of the curve when I did take driver training in high school. I passed with flying colors and got my driving permit allowing me to legally drive with adult supervision. On my 16th birthday, I promptly went to the Michigan Secretary of State's Office and took the test to get my first driver's license.

That's enough background. I have always been a fairly safe driver, but one who does not like to drive slowly. Yes, I have more than a little lead in my right foot. And, I have always enjoyed driving cars that allow me to flex that heavy foot. I often refer to it as, "driving a car the way it was designed to be driven." When I get on an interstate highway, I'm ready to move. So, it goes without saying that slow drivers work on my nerves. Slow drivers on entrance ramps; slow drivers in the passing lane; slow drivers in any lane. But, let me focus on the entrance ramps and passing lanes for a minute.

When entering an interstate freeway, I was taught, at the ripe young age of 13 by my father, that you need to get up to speed-- on the entrance ramp-- so that you can seamlessly merge into the flowing traffic. That notion was reiterated by my driver's education instructor, Coach Rodriguez, at Detroit Catholic Central High School. Unfortunately, there are many drivers who apparently never learned that lesson because they like to enter freeways doing 40 mph when the traffic is flowing at 60 mph and faster. Just last night, in fact, I was on my way home from work and somebody in front of me in a Ford Explorer SUV decided a good speed for getting on the highway was roughly 45 mph and there was no other vehicle ahead. (MAJOR FRUSTRATION!!!!) But my lead foot and the 215 horsepower engine in my Mercedes CLK wanted to get on up to 55 mph (actually, faster than that!) and we didn't feel like waiting on Mr. or Ms. Slow Poke. (It was dark and I couldn't see into the Explorer's window, but I did look.) Unfortunately, another pokey was in the right lane and I could not immediately go around. Then, the Explorer driver starts hitting the brakes as if to say to me, "slow down and get off my ass!" To that, I said.... well, I can't really print what I said but suffice it to say that my right foot pressed the accelerator and I slid around that idiot and moved on.

Another early lesson from Dad and later, my driver's education instructor, was that slower traffic is supposed to stay to the right and the left lane(s) are for passing. Now, I will admit that it took me a while to fully appreciate and embrace this rule of the road, but it's like Gospel now. Unfortunately, not every driver feels the same way. If I had a dollar for every time I have encountered a driver, in the passing lane, who refuses to move over for faster traffic, I could retire yesterday! JUST MOVE OVER!!! It's not that difficult.

I'm truly on my soap box now and I'm going to step off. I have to believe that if you've read this far, you understand where I'm coming from. If more people would just follow the rules of the road-- enter freeways at the flow of traffic and clear the passing lane for faster traffic-- we could reduce road rage dramatically. And, for Pete's sake, read the road signs and follow directions. If a sign says keep driving and merge into traffic after you turn, DO THAT! Don't stop and wait to turn. (I encounter that daily, too.)

Bottom line-- you can drive slowly if you want to. Just don't do it in front of me!

Oh, Good Evening!