Laughable Lions

When this season started, I was planning my weekly Sunday activities aroung the Detroit Lions kickoff time. I wanted to make sure I was on my sofa in front of the television to see the game from start to finish in beautiful, crystal clear high definition. Now, with the team languishing alone in the cellar of the NFC, I'm content to review the game on TiVo if necessary.

Watching this team play football-- make that attempt to play football-- is truly laughable. Sunday's game against Minnesota begins with former Lions running back Artose Pinner running through every hole the Lions defense wanted to give him. The Vikings ate up almost half of the first quarter on their opening drive which went 80 yards for a touchdown and the game's first score. I said at that time, if Detroit does not match that and score a touchdown on their first possession, the game would be over. So, what do they do? They fumble the ball away and the Vikings proceed to score another touchdown. It's 14-zip!

Next possession, Jon Kitna throws an interception on the third play. Detroit had two possessions and held the ball less than four minutes in the first quarter, running a total of nine plays, two of which resulted in turnovers. Oh, and yes, the Vikings did score again after that second turnover pushing the score to 20-zip early in the second quarter.

Detroit's first possession of the second quarter-- three and out. I was about ready to turn the game off until Jamar Fletcher picked off a Brad Johnson pass at the 12-yard line and ran it back 88-yards for a touchdown. It's now 20-7. Woohoo!!!

Minnesota appeared to want to let us back in the game. A fumble recovered by the Lions resulted in a Jason Hanson field goal to bring us back within 10 points. I guess we had a ballgame. But, everytime the Lions offense got us closer to the Vikings, the defense would let the Vikings stretch their lead back out. Then comes the clincher for me.

In the fourth quarter, with a little more than four minutes to play, Detroit is down 10 points and driving. The Lions get down to the Vikings one-yard line. They run Kevin Jones up the middle for no gain, and Jones gets injured to boot. He's out. Next play, Arlen Harris goes right, no gain. Next play after that is 4th and goal and instead of kicking the field goal, which they need, head coach Rod Marinelli decides to go for it and Jon Kitna gets sacked!!! Detroit gets NO points!! What the HELL was Marinelli thinking? That decision is right up there with former head coach Marty Mornhinweg winning the toss to start overtime at Chicago in 2002 and opting to kick instead of receive. Lions lost and the road losing streak continued.

Detroit did get the ball back, but it was too late then. They still needed two scores and that wasn't going to happen in the 1:50 left in the game. The final score: MIN 30 DET 20.

While you are not supposed to win when you turn the ball over 6 times, if you are truly trying to win the game and you know you need two scores and the clock is your enemy, you can't get into the red zone knowing you need a touchdown and a field goal to extend the game and not get either.

All of this leaves me right where my brother, Joe, has been for a while.

1. Jon Kitna is NOT the answer. He manages to throw multiple interceptions each game, most of them at THE most inopportune times.
2. Rod Marinelli may be another Marty Mornhinweg in terms of head coaching ability. The only difference, Marinelli is a defensive coach, Mornhinweg was an offensive coach. Both seem clueless in terms of decision making.
3. The above two notes are both a result of Matt Millen's total incompetence as Lions president. If he keeps his job after this season, we'll know the Ford family has no intentions of fielding a winning team anytime soon.

I'm done. The Lions gear is coming off the truck three weeks early this year. It's time to focus on the Pistons!

Oh, Good Evening!